Boss and assistant roleplay: a guide to try as a couple

Why this scenario works

Offices run on hierarchy, and hierarchy is a ready-made source of tension. One person decides, the other wants something decided in their favor, and the rules say they shouldn't be doing what they're about to do. The "we really shouldn't" does half the work.

It also suits couples who like a little structure. Playing the boss or the assistant lets each of you step into a version of yourself that is bolder, stricter or more daring than usual, and put it down again once the lights come on. A shared evening is the safest place to try on power, because both of you wrote the rules.

The two roles

Call them A and B. Who takes which part is for the two of you to decide, and there is always a rematch with reversed roles.

• A, the boss: finish the file and keep a professional distance from the assistant, as the position demands.
• B, the assistant: win the promotion, and prove to be indispensable.

Neither goal is quite honest, which is the point. The boss pretends to be unmoved, and the assistant pretends the promotion is the only thing at stake.

Setting and props

A desk or table, a chair, a laptop and a single lamp. Dim the rest of the room. A few props set the mood:

• a shirt and tie, or a tailored jacket;
• glasses;
• a stack of files;
• a pen to chew on, absentmindedly.

Try a message in the afternoon, in office-speak: "Please stay late tonight. We need to talk about your file." The day then builds toward the scene.

Three intensity levels

Choose before you start, and know you can switch at any time.

Gentle

A late meeting, lingering looks, leaning in close over the screen. You brush against each other and nothing more.

Playful

The file slips, the tie comes loose, a shirt or skirt rides up. "Close the door."

Intense

Whatever is on the desk ends up on the floor, and the promotion is negotiated up close. Only choose this if you've both said yes to it in advance, in a calm moment and not in the middle of the scene.

Are you both in?

Proposing a scenario about power can feel loaded. "I'd like to play boss and assistant" might mean a lot more or a lot less than you intend, and the other person has to guess which.

With Yes · No · Maybe you each answer in private, and the app reveals only the scenarios you both said yes or maybe to. Nobody sees a no, and nobody has to justify one. The Roleplay pack has 45 scenarios, and you go through them on your own phones before picking tonight's. It's a one-time premium purchase on iPhone or Android, and your partner can play without buying it. The free game in the browser is a gentle way to try the idea first, but the pack isn't part of it.

Choose your scenarios separately

The Roleplay pack in the Yes · No · Maybe app (iPhone and Android) lets you each answer in private. You only see the scenarios you agree on. Your partner can play without buying anything.

The phrase that ends the scene

Agree on a phrase that stops the game immediately and without discussion. For the office, it fits naturally: "We'll pick this up tomorrow morning." Both of you step away from the desk, and the conversation turns back into yours.

Whoever says it owes no explanation, and the other doesn't take it personally. If you want to go deeper, read about a safe word for roleplay.

Lines to get started

Opening line (A): "Close the door behind you. We have a problem."

Lines for A, the boss

• "Are you always this dedicated after 8 p.m.?"
• "Show me what you've prepared."
• "This isn't very professional, what you're doing. Keep going."

Lines for B, the assistant

• "I've been working overtime. I haven't logged it yet."
• "I can stay as late as it takes."
• "There's a line in my contract about 'other duties'."

Think of them as a tone to borrow. Once you've found your characters, you'll stop needing the list.

Three secret twists

Each of you secretly picks one:

• B has been recruited by a competitor and leaves tomorrow.
• A has already decided to give the promotion to someone else.
• The cleaning crew arrives in twenty minutes.

To turn up the heat: A gets up, walks around the desk and simply says, "Show me."

After the scene: talk about it

Keep it relaxed, like a conversation on the sofa. A few prompts:

• Which way did the power dynamic appeal to you most?
• Would you like to keep the formal, last-names-only tone for other scenes?
• What was the gesture that tipped the scene?

For a gentle way to close the evening, read after roleplay: aftercare and debrief.

To replay it differently: reverse the hierarchy, or play the night of the company retreat, when neither of you is at the office anymore.

Frequently asked questions

Does the boss have to stay in charge the whole time?

No. Part of the fun is the moment control shifts. Decide beforehand whether the assistant may turn the tables, or leave it as a surprise you both agree can happen.

Can we play it in a real office?

You can play it anywhere that is truly private. A real workplace is a risk to your jobs and to other people, so a home office or a corner of the living room set up as a desk is a safer stage.

What if we get the roles mixed up?

Then you've found a new version of the scene. Name the change out loud, check that you're both comfortable, and carry on.

Related scenarios

• Colleagues stuck in an elevator: the stalled ride
• Teacher and student: the private lesson
• Doctor and patient: the routine examination
• All roleplay ideas for couples